Is it really late February already?

Time is seeming very elastic at the moment, stretching out like caramelised sugar and constantly wrong-footing me. This morning I was inspecting a pot outside where I'd planted some chillies, and decided glumly that they weren't sprouting and so were probably dead, when I noticed on the label that I'd only put them in three days ago. It seemed like over a week.

On the other hand, it seems ridiculous that our second rent payment is due next week. It only feels like we've been in here a week or so, but in reality it's been quite a while. We're pretty much settled in now, with all the absolutely necessary furniture installed and most of our stuff unpacked. Still in boxes are most of the books, CDs and DVDs, which are waiting patiently in the spare room for us to buy a bookcase. This is one of those purchases that we've relegated to the 'when we have jobs' list, along with a thing to put the TV on (entertainment cabinet? I'm sure they have a name), a barbeque, an olive pitter and some decent cheese for a change. Our warped sense of priority means we bought an ice-cream machine this week - it was on a 50% off deal though, in fairness. So far I've made an orange & grapefruit sorbet and some plum ice-cream, both of which pretty good. It's taken a bit of getting used to but I think I have the hang of it now.

Actually, that said I think we're going to relent and get a barbeque anyway. The main reason for this, apart from the social stigma of living in New Zealand and not having one, is that our smoke alarm is so sensitive that showering with the bathroom door open can set the upstairs one off, so the indoor grilling of any meat at all involves all the windows being open, the Kiwi racing round the house flapping things, and me occasionally holding the grill pan outside the kitchen window. Yesterday evening I was grilling some chicken, and poked the sizzling, smoking pan out of the window just as a neighbour walked past - fortunately missing his suit by a whisker. So I think it's a worthwhile purchase. The smoke alarms, you see, are linked to the fire system in the building, which in turn is linked to both the fire service and the sprinklers, neither of which I want going off. We get charged for every fire truck that turns up, and they usually send several.

No news on the job front, although the Kiwi seems to have found some more tame recruiters, which if I've not heard anything by the end of this week I might be pimping myself to as well. The thing that's really getting me worried is the boredom and lack of stimulus - despite trying to follow all the online media and industry buzz I used to, I can feel my brain drying up and grinding to a halt, and the temptation to retreat from the world into a comfortable cocoon of Mario Kart, Simpsons, Quake Live and the odd glass of wine is getting harder to resist.

Hilariously, in the context of all this media nonsense about social media atrophying the brains of our young, Twitter and Facebook are about the only things keeping me sane at the moment.

Oh the glamour pt 2: Bradford, Cambridge, London

I'm writing this post on a train, reflecting on how much this particular environment will be a feature of my life this week. The two projects I've found myself on lately (the Irish thing does indeed seem to have let me go... fingers crossed) are helpfully located in Cambridge and Bradford, so I've seen a bit more of Kings Cross than I normally prefer to of late.

Small mercies: the majority of the work for both can be done either at my home office near the city or the offices of a creative agency in Piccadilly, but nonetheless this week I'm in Cambridge this afternoon and tomorrow afternoon, Bradford Wednesday and Thursday and hopefully London on Friday but who knows.

Both are good, fun, broadening projects which I'm enjoying a lot at the moment, but the travelling thing does put a bit of a dent in my life and my cashflow (racking up near £500 in travel expenses every month can be tricky to manage). Still, I'm not complaining, it pays the bills, most months.

Last week I ran another wine tasting for the team at work, with attendees from various other parts of the business taking the numbers up to around 30 or so, an improvement on previous evenings and weirdly for some reason suggested that a room of 30 people is easier to control than 20 - or perhaps I'm getting better at it, I dunno. Still, they seemed to enjoy it, and for the Facebookers amongst you the photos are up on our company group somewhere should you wish.

The weekend which followed was great, if surprisingly brief, with E&T coming round for dinner on Saturday night, which involved a morning's barging round Borough Market and Tesco and an afternoon's increasingly frantic cooking. Most of it went well, with the notable exception of me screwing up a lemon meringue pie AGAIN - this is turning into something of a culinary nemesis for me.

I'm sure I've made it perfectly at least once, but for some reason over the past few years they won't hold their shape properly. It all generally tastes great, but it's just a bit runny. I set some of the curd separately this time, and it set perfectly, so I think it's my meringue that's the problem - I think I need to spend a bit more time making sure it's properly robust, otherwise it sags a bit and (I think) causes the filling to sort of unset.

The Kiwi has got tickets to the wrestling tonight. Can't wait.

Hermitude

I know, I know, it's been ages since I last posted. I'm not ignoring you all or getting bored with bloggery, I've just been making a concerted effort to preserve my health and bank balances by staying in (and thus out of trouble) for the past couple of weeks. Bar half a night out with some old digital people (Blair, Dan A and some others) last week I've been very good indeed, even last weekend when I practically became one with the sofa. Bliss.

On the work front, things are pootling along quite nicely thank you very much. I've made my decision and am staying firmly within the retail team, as firstly it's what I understand and secondly there's a fair old job to be done in getting this business to behave like the market leader it's become. So that's that. It does mean I've now got a ton of work to do as well as my day job though...

The Kiwi and I went to the premiere of Beowulf on Sunday, what a lark that was - red carpet, Angelina Jolie, Anthony Hopkins (who was very gracious when the Kiwi burst out in solitary applause when he walked past - he'd so play her dad in the film of her life) etc. Truth be told it's a distinctly average film, but the 3D imagery really is quite special. It also gives you the opportunity to turn around halfway through the film and titter at the whole audience looking like Buddy Holly with their 3D specs on.

And as those who keep an eye on my Facebook profile will know, I'm less than impressed with Ms Jolie up close, which continues my trend in finding women who're known for being something special a bit average in the flesh. Shallow, I know, but I just can't help it. They all need to just eat some pies or something.

er... about that last post

Small retraction (rather than editing the original post, how big of me): apparently MS have bought a minority stake in Facebook for $240m, which values the site at an expected $15bn. Serves me right for reading early reports on Valleywag.

The move looks like one calculated to piss Google - who were also in the running to buy Facebook - off, and I have to say, in the terms of large business like this, that's utterly childish and massively hilarious.

I wish I could drop $240m just to bug someone. Hugh wouldn't know what'd hit him.

Facebook: on the way out?

Don't get me wrong, I love Facebook as much as the next person. It's helped me get back in touch with loads of people I'd drifted away from and it's generally lovely and a nice place to spend a few hours a week. However...

I don't know about anyone else, but I've noticed things slowing down a bit on FB. Not everyone's as active as they used to be - I know I've certainly stopped the poking and vampires and group-joining, and my homepage feed suggests many of my friends are doing the same. There's always going to be a usage profile like this with social sites; it's the ones which settle down into the background fabric of your life that win out - I say this but realistically haven't experienced it yet.

So, that's the user perspective: the honeymoon is over, boredom and real life sets in. Now two points from a business viewpoint, neither of which are news particularly but hey, it's my blog and I'll regurgitate hackneyed viewpoints if I want to.

1. Their business model just doesn't work. It's based on advertising revenues and yes, a normal revenue model would go through the roof given their traffic stats. However, not only do they have one of the lowest click through rates I've ever seen, their much-vaunted targeting is non-existent and they're massively overcharging for the privilege. There's a limit to how many £300k cash dumps a marketing budget can take before someone starts asking for proof of ROI.

2. They're on the verge, within a few hours I reckon, of being bought. Microsoft and Google are both in the running, but strong rumours suggest that MS is a front runner with a $15bn deal. Although Mr Zuckerberg will only get a tiny slice (if you call $240m tiny, it's still only a 2% stake), so it looks like Steve Ballmer had him over a desk.

Now, the cumulative effect of these two things is this. As a $15bn new toy, it's got to be made to work. So it'll be monetized in different, more aggressive ways. The problem with this is that the relative advertising quiet was / is one of the things that makes Facebook a nice place to be. Given that I'm getting bored already, it won't take many poorly targeted advertising gambits to make me pack up my vampires and head over to Orkut or something.

All that said, I'd genuinely love it to stick around. Partly as I do find it useful, partly as making something as genuinely Web 2.0 as Facebook work as a business would prove that the internet is evolving in a solidly commercial way. And that would make a web professional like me sleep soundly at night.

Next post will be back to rambling nonsense about shoes or something, I promise.

Shameless Panhandling

This is brilliant, and I hope you all see it in the same light as me because otherwise it might come across as little more than licensed begging, which in a way I suppose it is. Anyway, the new addition to my blog on the right there is my latest internet toy discovery.

ChipIn is a service where you can raise money for an event, or collect cash a group of people owe you. It's all secure, and the money you put in goes into my PayPal account. Once the cash starts pouring in, you should be able to see the money level rise. As an experiment, I'm seeing if I can raise ten US dollars, which by my reckoning should cover a sarnie and a bag of crisps in central London. Will it work, I wonder?

It's on my Facebook page, too. I know no shame.